RACQUETOLOGY

WEEK 4

Glenn Davis--Birmingham, AL
Davis is one of the odds on favorite to win the Nathanael Greene Wooden Classic. Davis quickly gained international fame with his early career on the Badminton circuit and received player of the year awards for both 93 and 94 Badminton seasons. After a torn groin muscle sidelined him for most of the 98 season, Davis successfully completed the transition to the hard courts. Davis is one of only a hand full of players that can serve with either hand, this becomes tricky late in the match for players that are used to seeing the usual right to left motion of Davis's side spinning first serve. Davis is banned from playing in Finland after an altercation with Finnish officials at the Paavo Nurmi Invitational.

Jon Sowar--Alexandria, VA
A monk sits at the bank of the Ganges River, calmly meditating in preparation for the upcoming tennis circuit. His village suffers from disease and cannot receive medicine because the people are poor. The monk decides he will raise money for medicine by entering the Nathanael Greene Wooden Classic. As Jon searches his inner self at the bank of the river, his wife Sally approaches him from behind. She knows it was a tough decision for Jon since he only lives to help people not hurt them. Suddenly Jon's body erupts in flames. Sally is stunned -- what had she done? Jon rises to face her. "Do not worry. This is the miracle of Yoga. It is not real flame. It is part of my aura. If I use this power, I can win the wooden classic without seriously hurting my opponent." Sally is relieved. "What you believe is the only way to go, Jon." His decision is made without hesitation.

Christopher Arnold--Washington, DC
Arnold is known to have a foothold in the dirty underground of our nation's capital. A stoic baseline game and very agile at attacking the net, Arnold's only problem is the fact that he has ties to the illegal Columbia Heights tennis syndicate and regularly bets against himself with huge payoffs going the syndicates way. The Nathanael Greene Society argued strongly for his ban from the Nathanael Greene Wooden Classic, but in the end his solid play and a hope for a hometown boy to make good was a movie in the making.

Lindsay Nash--Black Mountain, NC
Nash, a serve and volley specialist will thrill those with an insiders knowledge of the game. This player's player has a major downfall, her inability to turn left. She is currently working with the notarized hypnotise Virgil McJeffers and her Estonian coach, Kaia Kanepi. Will her very solid up and down game be enough for her to take home the prestigious Pearl trophy? Be assured that if she does win Nash will be placed to the right of the trophy during the presentation.

Sam Kirby--Meadows of Dan, VA
The king of reverse reverse psychology, Kirby will bend over backward to make you think that you are winning, and you will. However Kirby is still a force to be reckoned with. The sous-chef of his own six course tourney, Kirby serves up cross-slices faster than you can say fagabefe, pausing only to wipe the crumbs from his salty maw and in true Dickensonian style, come back for more. Known in some parts as the “Rojo Haired Loco” and the “Wooer of Llamas”, Kirby’s penchant for tex-mex tennis proves to be a double-edged sword, elevating his game to caliente! but deporting his toilet south of the border. Look for Kirby to drop it like it’s hot on and off the court, an all-too familiar phenomenon for unsuspecting Buenos Airians. Also keep your eyes peeled for Kirby’s tennis two-step, the Prom Special. Rumored as exotic and scintillating as the Ecuadorian Quetzal, it is just as elusive and every bit as intoxicating.